Core Communication Skills We have developed the five core communication skills in the last 10 years. Our work has allowed us to observe and then teach these behaviors and communication skills which are essential to effective one-on-one interactions. At Morningstar Ventures, we have concluded that there is a set of skills common to effective communicators. These “Five Core Communication Skills” are vital to a wide range of applications: leading, coaching and motivating employees, working with customers, resolving conflicts—any human interaction in the workplace. The Core Communication Skills are: Listen for Understanding Align to Build Trust Give Feedback without Side Effects Use Multiple Perspectives Communicate with Precision At Morningstar Ventures, we have developed skill-building exercises and activities for each of these core skills. They are adaptable to virtually any application that requires an understanding of and agility with the underlying principles of communication that make other skill building content work. We create stand-alone development programs that teach these core skills, and clients have added the skills to existing coaching, sales, and customer service curriculum—often proving that when learners know and can use the mechanics behind a coaching model (for example), they can then apply the larger skill more effectively across a wider range of situations. It’s the difference between paint-by-number and taking art lessons. Listen for Understanding It often is easiest to talk about what listening for understanding is not. It is not applying filters to our listening—filters such as listening for agreement or disagreement, listening for exception, (where the speaker is “wrong”) omission, (what the speaker left out) or addition (hearing things that were not even said.)  A simple concept—yet tough to apply without skill, discipline and focus. Align to Build Trust Like attracts like. People feel more comfortable with and are more trusting of those who act like, speak like and view the world like they do. It’s human nature. And at the same time, diversity of thought and experience are business essentials in our competitive, global environment. The most effective communicators create rapport—which leads to trust—through an often unconscious, yet systematic, method of aligning with various elements of the interaction. These elements include the other person’s mood, style, point of view, or positive intent—to name just a few. Everyone can learn to be more effective in creating rapport and trust through alignment—it’s not a secret of the gifted few. And we can all learn to do this with integrity, without compromising our own authenticity.		Give Feedback without Side Effects There are several problems with feedback—problems that actually cause the resistance that people show to giving or even receiving it. One problem: People often state conclusions and assumptions as if they are facts. We do this through both words and tone. We attribute motive and project feelings onto others (“You don’t care about anyone but yourself!”) and then wonder why people get defensive. Underlying this problem is an inability to state facts separate from conclusions, share conclusions in a way that conveys ownership, and “check them out” through questions. When people begin to change old behaviors and adopt a more useful and respectful feedback process, the results are astounding. Use Multiple Perspectives A perspective is a place from which things can be viewed or considered. One perspective is our own point of view--what I think, feel, see, need and want. How I view the situation. Useful, but limiting in situations requiring objectivity, empathy or consideration of the impact of context on a given circumstance. We use hundreds of perspectives intentionally and unconsciously every day of our lives. Some are more powerful than others in providing us with useful information. When highly effective communicators are involved in situations that have much complexity and conflict, they tend to play out in their minds how each constituency would likely respond to certain ideas and actions. This produces a more encompassing understanding of the whole of the situation. In this way, perspectives inform us toward wisdom. Whether we gain in wisdom is not a function of what happens to us, rather, how what we experience is understood, integrated and acted upon. This process can be learned through a set of steps, then called upon as situations demand it. Communicate with Precision Masterful communication is concrete, specific and sensory or data-based, creating a clear map from which two people can build shared understanding and meaning. People make sense of the world around them in unique ways; the truth gets skewed—and thus communicated—in three generic ways: deletions, distortions, and generalizations. Deletions (leaving information out) distortions (misrepresentations) and generalizations (Ex: “None of our people ever take any responsibility”) can be avoided as we “send” communication—and they can be corrected by the receiver through relevant, simple, and on-target questions.